I've always felt I was emotionally strong. I kept my heart hidden and people at arms length.

I'm at my emotional breaking point. I'm getting tired of being that nice girl to walk all over. I'm tired of being someones late night text. I'm tired of feeling like I don't matter. I'm tired of crying over someone who doesn't give a shit about me. I'm tired of searching for someone who doesn't exist. I'm tired of coming in last place. I'm tired of sitting and waiting. I'm tired of being backup. I'm tired of wondering where someone stands emotionally. I'm tired of not being good enough. I'm tired of being insecure. I'm tired of faking my smile. I'm tired of thinking about him. I'm tired of crying myself to sleep. I'm tired of staying up just in case he texts. I'm tired of being tired. Above all, I'm tired of these guys complaining about there not being any nice girls, or nice girls go for bad boys blah blah blah. At the end of the day a nice girl wants a nice guy.

I want to feel like I matter to you. I want to know a hint of what you're feeling. Make me feel something or let me walk away.

I love Washington. Its been an awesome trip and I'm so not ready for it to be over. Kiddo is fully walking now. She has 3 teeth and the 4th is coming in.

I am really loving life right now

"but with you I forget to feel the pain"

I used to be someone's world
..and I still don't know what happened...


Why won't you wake up and see what was in front of you?




I miss him more every day. I hate that I don't even have his voice in a voicemail.
...I still don't get why he hasn't called...

all i hear is the sound ice makes when water is poured over it

....seriously.....

I'd like my sadness to turn into anger already.
I'd like to not care.
I'd like to erase you from my memory.
..I'd like to matter to you for a change.

I swear I can hear my heart splinter

I'd like to know where I went wrong
I'd like to know why you let me try
I'd like to why you stopped loving me
...I'd like to know why I wasn't good enough

I wish walking away came easy for me too

What is the key to a lasting happy marriage?

Love..excitment..lust

Why do we always put it on the other person to make/keep us happy? Ultimately it's up to yourself to keep you happy. It's in no way your partners responsibility. If you can't make yourself happy, how do you expect someone else to make you happy? They don't insight into your head, they don't know your every thought...and when you don't let them in it makes it that much more difficult to even attempt to make you happy.
Your happiness is in your hands

Does no one get that a marriage takes work?!
Who you were when you met is not always you will be down the road. You have to grow together. Why does it seem no one is willing to fight for their marriage? ...Where does the passion go? Where does any of it go?

soldiers are a dime a dozen...a father and husband are hard to come by

I would have changed so many things.
Maybe it really is all my fault.
I could have been more understanding..a better listener..a better person

Why marry someone knowing their flaws but not loving them for their flaws
I'm sorry I'm me
..But could really imagine the world with nothing but "you"?

If anything I'm walking away with the best thing on Earth.
I have the love of my life..and you have yours.

..except in the end mine will hold my hand..and yours will just retire and replace you

I hope you're happy with your choice
just remember I never asked you to choose
I was always fine with being second

In a lyrics mood

"Gone For Good" The Shins

You want to fight for this love

But honey you cannot wrestle a dove

So baby it's clear

You want to jump and dance

But you sat on your hands

And lost your only chance

Go back to your hometown

Get your feet on the ground

And stop floating around

I find a fatal flaw

In the logic of love

And go out of my head

You love a sinking stone

That'll never elope

So get used to used to the lonesome

Girl, you must atone some

Don't leave me no phone number there

"Forever" Ben Harper

Not talkin' 'bout a year

No not three or four

I don't want that kind of forever

In my life anymore

Forever always seems

to be around when it begins

but forever never seems

to be around when it ends

So give me your forever

Please your forever

Not a day less will do from you

Don't worry...I won't be posting Kelly Clarkson haha